What I will miss

As my time in Seoul dwindles to one week, I find myself doing an enormous amount of reflecting on this life-changing year that is now perilously close to being over. As I try to reconcile my leaving, I’m thrilled to look back on this year and realize that I have no regrets. I have loved every single second of my time here and am very happy with the way that I spent my time. I feel that I have taken full advantage of all this city has to offer, never let the brief moments of homesickness bring me down, strengthened my relationship with Nate and made life-long friends. In some ways, I’m incredibly sad to say goodbye to this city that has been so good to me, but I also realize that it’s time to go. I have such an incredible adventure in front of me, and the most eye-opening aspect of this journey is that everything I really need is at home.

Of course, parts of me are incredibly sad, in bittersweet kind of way, and I can say without question that there are certain parts of my life here that I will miss for as long as I live.

First and foremost, I will miss the liveliness of this city. I was so fortunate in my living arrangements in getting placed smack-dab in the center of the business district of Seoul. I cannot express enough how much everything is literally right outside my door. I take 5 steps and find myself in the middle of bustling activity, high-rises, throngs of people, restaurants and bars. Best of all, one of my best friends, Michelle, lives 5 minutes walking from me.  In addition to missing all this action, I will desperately miss having such a close friendship with someone who is so geographically close. Additionally, I have an attachment to Michelle because she has been there for me with so many things. She’s half Korean, so she was always the person that helped me with culture shock, language barriers and getting things done that I couldn’t do on my own. Plus, she always listens to me, even though I talk way too much. I will also miss Mary, always the voice of reason, Kahlid, who never fails to make me laugh, KK, always the life of the party, and so many others. My friends have taught me so much about myself, and I feel so lucky to know all of them. I don’t worry that we’ll lose touch, but it saddens me to acknowledge how different our friendships will be going forward.

I will also miss my job. I’m fairly certain that teaching in Korea saved me from a nervous breakdown, and for that, I am eternally grateful. I will miss my adorable students, but mostly, I’ll miss my co-teachers. So many of my friends here tell me horror stories about their co-workers, but the people I work with have been amazing. Any time I needed anything taken care of, it was done before I could even finish saying what I needed. As time has gone by, I have gotten to know them on a more personal level, and I absolutely love them. Furthermore, I have never had a job where I have been so loved and appreciated. My co-teachers and bosses have begged me, numerous times to stay. My position has been eliminated due to changes in the government’s view of native teachers, but my school was willing to use their own budget to keep me here. No other high school in the city is keeping their native teachers, but my school loves me and was willing to do anything to keep me here. It’s so satisfying to know that I truly did a great job in this position and exceeded everyone’s expectations. I really hope I can one day find a job that gives me the satisfaction I’ve had here.

I will miss my endless walks that always yielded the discovery of a new favorite place. I will miss ‘posting up’ with $1 bottles of alcohol outside convenience stores with friends and the endless people watching that always ensued, I will miss amazing and cheap Korean food, I will miss late night, drunken street-food runs, I will miss noraebangs, I will miss my tiny apartment that provided endless hours of solitude and self-reflection, I will miss hearing Korean and I will miss my stress-free existence.

Yet with all these wonderful aspects of my life here, it’s time to go home. And I’m ready. I can only explain my feelings right now as blissful. I have spent a euphoric year here in Seoul, but also realize that I’m leaving at the perfect time, and I have quite an adventure waiting for me back home. I have fulfilled every desire I had in coming here, I have lived the past year without regrets, and I’ve made some amazing friends. I feel completely at peace with my time here and also my return to the U.S. All I can say is that I am eternally grateful, happy, and I’ve finally figured out my priorities in life. Not a bad year if I may say so ;-)

With that, I bid you adieu, or Annyeonghikaysayyo to Seoul. I can’t thank you enough for all you have done for me, and I will never, ever forget you.